The conversation I am not having…

Generally at New Years I forgo making any resolution. I have the dedication and commitment of squirrel crossing the road when it comes to keeping those resolutions. I think the entire “New Year’s Resolution” is simply a trap to feel guilty later on. For me it is generally January 3^rd or 4^th if I am lucky enough to make it that far. But this year is different. I have decided to make a resolution. My resolution is to not engage in the following conversation.

 Homosexuality

 It is not that I have been proselytizing over the issue. I neither stand on street corners handing our pamphlets or begin conversations with, “You know…” Yet, I have been passionate about this issue, and am often engaged in the conversation.

I have decided I am not having any conversation regarding whether homosexuality is a sin and/or what the bible says about it. This dialogue has been going on since as long as I can remember. I still remember when “A day without orange juice” implied that gay was not okay.[1] There are a number of reasons why I have decided to forego the debate.

          First, any conversation regarding sexuality should be between the person and their spiritual mentor. Not that I think that sexual mores should not be discussed, they should. The values around sexuality that we should be discussing is about the respect and dignity afforded each other. Please understand that requiring consent is about respect and dignity.

          Second, collectively us Christians have done incredible damage to our own moral legitimacy by engaging in this discussion. I have even heard it suggested that the "gay issue” is worth splitting the church over. (It so isn’t). By engaging in this discussion I have been complicit in perpetuating this insanity. There are sexual sins that are so much more deserving of our attention, time, and energy. First, would be the trafficking of children, women, and men for sexual exploitation. Collectively, we remain awfully quiet in this regards. (which concerns me.) Second, is rape culture. (I am more than willing to engage in a discussion that it does exist. Our mentality of “the woman had it coming” even permeates our judicial system.)

          If we ever have the issues of rape and trafficking being seriously discussed, I might be more inclined to return to the “gay” conversation. In an earlier time I was told that my stance on homosexuality was a distraction. I now know how much of a distraction it was and still is. These, to my mind, are the issues worth getting worked up over, not the acts of two consenting adults.

          Third, most of us, if not all of us, have become far too concerned over the speck in our sibling’s eye while we ignore the plank in our own eye. For me it comes down to the point that my journey of faith is my journey. (And, am I the only one who gets this is a carpenter joke?) Having soup with my friend one day, his comment was, “Who am I to say someone else’s sins are worse than my own?” My focus on you is to be one of ‘how can I be of help?’ 

          While I realize that I risk “to say nothing is be complicit” I think it is important that we stop worrying about consenting adults and move onto more egregious concerns.

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[1] In the late 70’s Anita Bryant an American Singer, beauty pageant winner, and Anti-LGBTQ activist was also the spokesperson for Florida Orange Juice.